There is a weird bias against bisexual men in media. Someone I knew even once said she didn’t believe bisexual men existed, all men are either straight or gay. For me self identification is important. If someone tells me they’re straight but I believe they’re bisexual, I’m going to call them straight.
Oh I’ve heard the “bisexual men don’t exist” thing a million times, often from gay men.
I like to shut the conversation down by waving around the statistic that for every gay man, there are 3 bisexual men.
I’ve seen so many cases of staunch progressive groups weaponize a guys sexuality as soon as they have a falling out with him. Its like these people never believed what they were saying. People are so spineless and have no morals.
My favourite is the ones who scream about slut shaming then use “virgin” as an insult.
Although that seems to have fallen out of fashion lately.
That specific insult I mean, not hypocrisy.
It’s not out of fashion at all, “virgin” just became “incel”. The intent is identical.
Not really. Incel implies a level of indoctrination into a misogynistic POV that has you convinced that you’re better off alone. It’s not the same as insulting someone for simply not having had sex yet.
edit: not that I think either is a productive thing to call another person
Incel implies a level of indoctrination into a misogynistic POV
No one is thinking this deeply when they call a man who just said/did something they don’t like an “incel”. People just use it mindlessly as an insult, same as with “virgin”.
I think people who haven’t been been the target of insults since high school (or maybe ever?) forget how petty and uncreative it often is.
The point insulting someone isn’t to be truthful, it’s to be hurtful or put them down.
Maybe if they’re really young and weren’t on the internet when the word became popular, sure
who else call people virgin anyways?
Good point, but I still think incel carries a certain connotation of misogyny with it, though. Otherwise you would just say “virgin”
Not at all. Incels are almost overwhelmingly misogynistic and into a lot of weird pseudo scientific shit. Incels are those claiming they deserve women but at the same time don’t deserve them because they’re too beta and all the rich alphas are getting 10 chicks a second, so they excuse their lack of success with dating in a lot of made up bullshit to delude themselves into never improving as people.
Incels are not just virgins, they’re basically a cult, and thinking people use it just as ‘virgin’ is either deliberately obtuse or ignorant
I agree with everything you said, but also, there are absolutely people who just call weird guys incels regardless of whether or not it actually fits.
thinking people use it just as ‘virgin’ is either deliberately obtuse or ignorant
That’s just what people say these days, even if it’s inaccurate. They don’t care, they just want to insult and trigger. Who is the ignorant?
I mean, fair enough, but also, we really shouldn’t be making it even entertaining new definitions for words based on online ragebait.
People always say stuff to me like, “You definitely live with your parents”. That one is super common. Like, who cares? It’s weird for me personally because I moved out over 20 years ago, but nothing wrong if I did live with my folks. It’s a world as hard as stone out there.
Living with your parents while working = being rich speedrun
With leftists and progressives the louder they are about their beliefs and virtues the less they actually follow those through. Just like with religious people, it’s just virtue signaling.
Sadly, this is a human trait overall. It’s deep in the lizard brain section from early in our evolution.
If someone is part of a group and then does something seen as against the interest of the group (or groupthink, really) then any tiny little thing can become a trait leveraged against them. Either the person on the outs basically accepts demotion on the social ladder and hopes for re-acceptance from the group as subservient to everyone, or they’re just out for good. It’s one of our worst traits from a rational perspective, it’s violent and irrational monkey-brain shit, and likely made for small homogeneous, tight-knit groups that could count on each other to survive harsh environmental conditions.
When I was fairly younger, I was in a relationship with a woman who told me that if she were to learn that I had sex with a man, especially bottoming but also topping (she didn’t use those terms, she used bad terms), then she would feel disgusted and betrayed and would never feel attracted to me again or see me as a man again.
I said to her that I was disappointed in her, that she had internalised homophobia and that she was a massive hypocrite. Her self proclaimed best male friend presented to the world as flamingly gay, and she was openly bi herself, not as in “I would totally fuck women cause I like the idea of it”, bus as in she had fucked women before and would do it again. Apparently she deserves to be fucked by a real man, which apparently bi men are not.
So…yeah, you can be a loudly proclaimed ally AND a member of the LGBTQ community yourself, and still be a disgusting homophobe right alongside the best of bigots.
I have a similar story to share.
When I was in my early 20s I briefly dated a girl who told me she was having feelings for another woman and was being curious, she eventually broke up with me in order to be with her, but we remained good friends after that.
Eventually she came out as a lesbian and when I told her that I was bi she immediately ended our friendship all even yelled some slurs at me.
AFAIK she’s married with a guy and has kids now
Wow, that’s some intense double standards there.
Wow, that’s some intense double standards there.
That’s an odd way of saying “ubiquitous female standards”.
You’ve just been all over this thread with your misogynistic hot takes and telling people how “all women” act. You should get off the internet for a while.
You’ve just been all over this thread with your misogynistic hot takes and telling people how “all women” act. You should get off the internet for a while.
Mmm-hm. Attempts to socially shame me into silence and an ad hominem on top of that, but not a whisper of a viable rebuttal.
That’s the problem with these censure attempts – always feelings over facts, instead of facts over feelings.
There is nothing you’ve said worthy of rebuttal.
There is nothing you’ve said worthy of rebuttal.
Ah - a sour grapes response!
Don’t worry, I know you had absolutely nothing to counter with once I saw the ad hominem. That’s the problem with intellectual bankruptcy, after all - nothing to work with except rage and other emotions. No facts, only feelings. So out come the personal attacks like the ad hominems, because rage and shame are the only usable tools left.
I know it’s a bit different, but there are cis women out there knowingly dating trans women who’ve likely had sex with men. So common yet, but I think ubiquitous isn’t accurate.
Actually now that I’m thinking about it I knew a girl who hooked up with her gay guy best friend.
I wasn’t commenting on this particular double standard anywhere as much as double standards in general; especially those which are almost exclusively one-way and “acceptable” for only women to hold. That a man trying to employ the same attitudes would be pilloried and castigated to the same degree that women would be lauded and supported.
Sorry you had to experience this bullshit. I think people like that lack the emotional intelligence to see other people as equals. Instead they only value them as much as whatever personal satisfaction they extract out of them. Intrinsically you’ve lost nothing of value that day, but I know the sudden betrayal of the friendship you thought you had can be shocking and hurtful.
Maybe calling women lesbians instead of gay allows people to be homophobic while accepting lesbians. After all, the word was invented by men who thought women couldn’t be gay the way men can.
I’m curious what the people’s opinions are who downvoted you. Do they disagree or are they just angry? If they disagree they should have left a comment explaining why, so I’m assuming they’re irrationally upset and voicing their opinion would make them look bad maybe?
Eventually she came out as a lesbian and when I told her that I was bi she immediately ended our friendship
Can’t really imagine it. Even stubborn homophobes do not end friendship over someone coming out. A lot of them just become curious and eventually accepting. Am not LGBTQ+ though, so my judgement is kinda not reliable, but still.
The woman you’re talking about is exceptionally weird and she can go fuck herself
It’s adorable that you think “stubborn homophobes” wouldn’t end a friendship over someone coming out. I genuinely wish they did just become curious and eventually accepting, instead of immediately rejecting and intimidating and expressing feelings of disgust and revulsion.
In my 20s I was this homophobe until a friend came up to me. Maybe it’s my projection, idk
Your experience is valid, as it happened to you and none of us in this thread were there probably anyway.
In my experience, friends don’t end friendships over homophobia. They just suddenly become very busy and they have less and less time to spend with the person who comes out as bi.
‘Bi erasure’ is such a common phenomenon that we invented the term ‘bi erasure’.
Also I come from a different background to the most of those who are here. In Russia, we have this state propaganda that seals homophobia and since nobody is trusting the government propaganda, a lot of people are simply curious what it is to be gay (or bi, trans). And homophobia is not typical to what I hear from my peers in the west: it often has somewhat patronizing form of “don’t you know that if you say you’re gay, you’ll get a lot of trouble”. It was literally the thing I said to a lovely gay couple when we went to the bar in Saint Petersburg.
IME this is incredibly common.
I had a bi girlfriend who was also super uncomfortable with the idea of me being with another man.
I had a bi girlfriend who wanted me to be bi. I’ve seen it go every which way. I’m not sure what the overall social trend is, but people are individuals and can defy your hopes and expectations of them in strange ways, for better or for worse.
I don’t know how common it is, but I’ve had several past girlfriends express internalised homophobia against gay men, bisexuals or lesbians, and that’s too damn high a number since as french leftist, I don’t harmonize with conservative women. When I was younger I was naive or dumb enough to think that we would both grow as people in the relationship and some of my values would rub up on them. Now that would an instant curtain call for me, you can grow up as person in your own time, I have better things to do.
Apparently she deserves to be fucked by a real man, which apparently bi men are not.
I would categorize it as a weird fetish and leave her by herself with it
Honestly, while the exact way your ex handled the situation probably wasn’t ideal, this notion is really just an extension of the sexual puritanism that created homophobia in the first place. Imo, we should just accept that people’s sexual desires are what they are. If someone is turned off by bi guys, that’s fine - she doesn’t have to date them. Just like it is perfectly fine to be turned off by people with red hair, or people with annoying laughs, or people who are skinnier or fatter than whatever your personal preference is. Some people aren’t interested in shy people. Some people aren’t interested in dumb people. Some people aren’t interested in poor people. Does it suck when someone you like isn’t interested in you because of something you can’t control? Yes! But at the same time, people’s sexual preferences are also largely outside their control. So why demonize them for them?
Ugh… Thanks for whiteknighting my ex’s being biphobic with your moral relativism.
First of all I don’t know why you felt the need to inject sexual puritanism into the conversation, it’s not really a thing culturally in present day France, especially not in me or my exes mindset or social circles.
Second, don’t give me this your mileage may vary bullshit, some things are objectively bad. Having preferences is fine. Being phobic against a group of people is not. It’s fine to be more easily attracted to tall people, or short, or green eyed, or mixed raced or whatever physical characteristic, as long as it doesn’t turn into a fetish, and I won’t get into that whole other subject. But being repulsed or disliking an entire group of people because of a not morally wrong trait, is objectively wrong and textbook definition of being phobic. Being attracted more easily/often to white people with blue eyes and dimples rather than black people is fine, you like what you like. But being repulsed by all black people, or gingers, or Asians, for the sole reason they are black, or ginger, or Asian, is not. And no, nobody said you owe some random person a shag, just because they’re from a minority. But questioning why someone is repulsed by the entirety of group of people is legitimate. If there’s something universally morally wrong with a group, like fucking Nazis, it’s fine being repulsed. If there’s a rational reason to reject someone, like not wanting to get a in a relationship with a firefighter cause you don’t want a partner who may die in a fire one day, or your sexual orientation is not compatible, then it’s fine rejecting them but not disliking or being repulsed by them. If the only reason you dislike or are repulsed by a group of people is irrational, like they’re a different race or different sexual orientation, then it’s textbook bigotry/phobia, and that’s objectively wrong.
So to go back to the story with my ex; being a bisexual man is not a visual or physical trait. So if you’re a woman who likes having sex with men, and you were to reject or feel disgust for a man you otherwise are attracted to and enjoy having sex with, for the only reason that you can’t deal with the idea/image of him having sex with other men in the past, that’s textbook biphobia and homophobia, and that’s objectively wrong. If you feel so disturbed by this hypothetical, you feel the need to ask me, your partner at the time, a self declared straight man you are in a committed relationship with, if I hid sexual experiences with men from you, to assuage your irrational fears, you’re being biphobic and that’s just wrong. Again, if you’re a woman having sex with men, and don’t trust bisexual men because you think they will cheat with men, guess what, still biphobic, still wrong. Nobody’s demonizing anybody, moral relativism sucks, some things are in fact objectively wrong.
yeah, it’s super weird how desperate people are to rationalize this nonsense.
like… being turned off by someone’s race. it’s just your phobia/racism. it’s not a ‘preference’ like people like to claim. esp if your ‘turned off’ feelings are a product or assumption about that person’s sexuality/race being a crude stereotype or entrenched in outdated nonsense. neither of those things is a choice either.
it’s the idea that they are disgusted/turn off by. it’s not a part of sexuality at all, it’s that they associate negative traits with a certain sexuality. that’s messed up. and it’s also not really rejecting the person, it’s rejecting the category.
But being repulsed by all black people, or gingers, or Asians, for the sole reason they are black, or ginger, or Asian, is not.
So gay men should suck it up and give women a chance?
If the only reason you dislike or are repulsed by a group of people is irrational
Most of attraction/unattraction is not rational. It is emotional. It is a visceral feeling that doesn’t care about logic.
I, personally, don’t like mint chocolate. When I put it in my mouth, I feel a visceral feeling of disgust, and spit it out. There is no logic behind this - it is just what I like and don’t like.
not a visual or physical trait.
I also provided examples of being turned off by people who are shy, dumb, or poor. Again, these are not logical reasonings, but visceral responses to an individual and their traits.
Nobody’s demonizing anybody
You’re demonizing all women who like straight guys but are turned off by bi guys by calling them biphobic.
some things are in fact objectively wrong.
Objectivity is when something is true with no observer present. Morality requires an observer to decree what is right and wrong. This is why we have many philosophical schools of ethics, but only one school of physics (except at the very edge of research).
So gay men should suck it up and give women a chance?
…
“If there’s a rational reason to reject someone, like […]or your sexual orientation is not compatible, then it’s fine rejecting them but not disliking or being repulsed by them.”
Second paragraph, towards the end. So what else didn’t you bother to read / try to understand ?
Are the sexual orientations of gay men and women compatible ? Did I imply that anywhere ?
Most of attraction/unattraction is not rational. It is emotional. It is a visceral feeling that doesn’t care about logic.
I, personally, don’t like mint chocolate. When I put it in my mouth, I feel a visceral feeling of disgust, and spit it out. There is no logic behind this - it is just what I like and don’t like.
We’re not talking about food, were talking about people. If they’re not harming anyone, they deserve to be treated with respect, as equals. Treating people with respect includes overcoming any prejudice you may have internalised growing up. Also having a visceral reaction, not an excuse. Visceral reactions can be questioned, and their causes deconstructed. It is possible to grow up as a person even as adult. Racism is visceral reaction, and it still wrong. At least in the reality of moral objectivism that I live in.
But I am curious, do some groups of people give you a “visceral feeling of disgust” like mint chocolate gives you ? What groups of people would those be ?
I also provided examples of being turned off by people who are shy, dumb, or poor. Again, these are not logical reasonings, but visceral responses to an individual and their traits.
Yeah, and you can choose whomever you like as a partner, but repulsion for an entire group of people not doing any harm like poor people or shy people, is the realm of irrational hatred or fear, and that’s never ok. Or are you saying it’s ok or normal being viscerally repulsed by poor or shy people ?
Again visceral feeling are not an excuse, you’re have higher reasoning, and are supposed to at least try to understand and control your feelings if you want to treat other people fairly. Otherwise there’s no sense of accountability for your actions, you just go by pretending you’re a mere vessel to your emotions, and stay indifferent to how your behaviour affects other people.
You’re demonizing all women who like straight guys but are turned off by bi guys by calling them biphobic.
If the only thing turning off a woman in a man is that he is bisexual then yeah, that’s what being prejudiced is. Same guy, same level of physical attractiveness, just as good a person, but straight : desirable. Exact same person but bisexual man : repulsive and less than a real man. That’s a biphobic woman, she doesn’t see bisexual men as worthy of the same level of respect as straight men, as equals to straight men.
But I get the sense that your ethics and mine don’t mix.
Objectivity is when something is true with no observer present. Morality requires an observer to decree what is right and wrong. This is why we have many philosophical schools of ethics, but only one school of physics (except at the very edge of research).
Look. I’m not a philosopher or a historian of Ideas, so my knowledge of moral relativism and moral objectivism or universalism, is at a highschool level, so I think what I’m saying and how I’m saying is perfectly understandable in every day language without resorting to philosophical semantics (and frankly I don’t even know why you brought up physics in a story about social issues).
In my stance of moral objectivism, I hold my ex accountable for her prejudice against bisexual and gay men, because it’s a stance where seeing bisexual men as inferior and repulsive is wrong regardless of your personal history, culture and upbringing, since being a bisexual man does no harm to anyone and if that bothers you you should get a life.
In your stance of what I see as moral relativism, it’s unfair to hold my ex accountable for her prejudice because the context of her “visceral feeling of disgust” is what is truly important, and she’s just unjustly misunderstood.
Those two stances are not compatible.
your sexual orientation is not compatible, then it’s fine rejecting them but not disliking or being repulsed by them.”
I mean, I’m referring to sexual repulsion. This is typically what people are referring to when they talk about having a preference against some person or other. It manifests as a visceral negative reaction, very similar to what one might feel if they think about eating something they find gross. A gay man would find the idea of sleeping with a woman repulsive. He can still treat women with respect. In the same way, a woman can find the idea of sleeping with a bi guy repulsive, and can still treat bi men with respect. This is an incompatibility in sexual orientation.
Same guy, same level of physical attractiveness, just as good a person, but straight : desirable. Exact same person but bisexual man : repulsive and less than a real man
I could just as easily swap in what kind of shoes the guy wears, the guy’s political affiliation, the accent the guy has, the way he has chosen to style his hair, or literally anything else.
But I am curious, do some groups of people give you a “visceral feeling of disgust” like mint chocolate gives you ? What groups of people would those be ?
Certainly. I’m straight. The idea of sleeping with another man gives me a visceral feeling of disgust. This is fine. I am completely comfortable admitting this, because this is my sexual preference.
Or are you saying it’s ok or normal being viscerally repulsed by poor or shy people?
It is 100% okay to feel whatever feelings one feels. If the thought of sleeping with someone who is poor or shy is repulsive to you, then that is fine. You don’t have to sleep with them.
and frankly I don’t even know why you brought up physics in a story about social issues
Because I don’t think you know what the word “objective” means.
The Aztecs thought it was right to sacrifice children to the gods by cutting their hearts out. We don’t. Moral relativism says that both of these points of view are equally valid in their respective cultures. I happen to think that this is more or less the correct point of view, since any kind of objective morality is literally impossible because all morality is is values, and values are pure subjectivity. But that’s an academic distinction.
My point fits squarely within good ol’ fashioned liberal western ethics, which you identified as “does no harm to anyone”.
Being sexually repulsed by bisexual men, and expressing this preference by simply not sleeping with them harms no one.
I could give a detailed answer like I did till now but why bother.
No to all you’ve just said.
Also moral relativism and nihilism is edgelord garbage, I thought so when I was a highschooler and I always will. You can and you should have some universalism regarding morals. You shouldn’t fuck children, no matter the culture or time in history. Pain is also universal and so is the evil of inflicting it for pleasure or callousness. I could go on but you and I have nothing to say to each other.
Sounds like you’ve realized I’m right but just don’t want to admit it.
Goddamn you’re dumb
I am a straight white man and I can’t even weigh in on this issue because if I defend the bi ppl ill get a stigma attached to me
You can also be brave and not give a fuck how anybody that would think less of you for being compassionate might stigmatize you. But this is the internet and I have no context.
If just second-hand stigma is enough for you to change your behavior, imagine how much worse it is for someone who is actually bi
This seems like a non-issue, just personal anxiety.
Oh fuck off with that.
Fun fact: back in Roman times, it was manly to fuck a twink. Being fucked by another man made you a woman (in their eyes, women were inferior in every aspect). I suppose something similar happened in Greece for a good while
People like this are the progressive version of evangelicals. And like with Christianity they don’t get called out enough to keep it from becoming a major problem.
Villainizing male sexuality is why we have a whole new generation boys heading into alt right circles and so far the response has been a variant of telling them to ‘man up.’ And its going to get a lot worse before it gets even a little better.
This is the root of the problem with much of the discussion around male identity online.
Women finally, and rightfully, gained a voice, and plenty of dudes listened. Many of them, not really understanding feminism as an academic discipline or having any real sympathy towards any aspect of being a man, used that voice to point of the many issues faced by women in the world and to fight for women.
Where this falls apart is that because of the lack of real understanding regarding feminism and the concept of patriarchy, a lot of it boiled down to “shut up, the women are talking” and “we don’t care about your problems”
None of this makes the problems away, none of this is really geared towards equality, and much of it is just switching the genders on deeply toxic patriarchal power structures that were used to oppress women for centuries.
When you think about how stupid 90% of the people involved on both sides of this discourse online are, it’s of little surprise so many women went looking for easy answers from hucksters who pitched exploitation and oppression as empowerment.
I really liked bell hooks’s approach to this. She focuses on incorporating male problems into feminism as a focal point, not excluding them.
Interesting. What’s a good place to start reading what bell hooks said about this?
The Will to Change by bell hooks is the book you want! Short read too, but very meaningful. I’ve been making my way through it extremely slowly for several months, trying to digest everything. It’s interesting to see how she often conflicts with a lot of contemporary feminists as well.
The Will to Change by bell hooks is the one book that made me feel seen as a person. Usually I open a feminist book with the suspicion that the author will be like “all men are evil” and that usually makes me care less about feminism for a while. But that book was a pleasant surprise, it spoke to me and not at me.
Well said! I like the acknowledgment that men being at the table can help and may be better to address patriarchy and other problems that face everyone. We all move forward together or no one does.
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they don’t get called out enough to keep it from becoming a major problem.
idk man 9 times out of 10 I hear someone talking about progressives, they’re exclusively referring to the most hypocritical ones. Like, when does anyone talk about the normal progressives that just want good things for everyone? That’s boring.
I don’t count conservatives
okay, but then, who else is talking about progressives?
I wouldn’t consider a woman that drops a guy for this reason to be a progressive.
You wouldn’t believe how many progressive women only date stereotypically conservative men. Here is a metanalysis of five studies showing how women in general prefer men who espouse and act out “benevolent sexism.” This is the age old problem for men: women say they want one thing, but date something completely different.
Fortunately for me, in the dating arena, being honest about myself to a fault did a great job vetting dates all on its own.
You would be suprised by how much of the left hates bisexuals, without realizing that makes them as bad as any other bigot
Some of the weirdest shit I have seen in the LGBT sphere is how comfortable some of them are with dictating who is allowed to date whom and whether or not their preferences are okay.
It’s the main reason I don’t really vibe with the LGBT community. Don’t mind gays and trans and whatever else is out there. Normal people living their normal lives and loving the people they love and finding ways to be comfortable in their own bodies is how things should be.
But the LGBT sometimes reminds me of organized religion. It’s not the individual believer who lives his or her life in peace who is the problem, but the weird cultlike behavior going on in the group where everybody has to hold the same opinions that tend to become progressively more extreme over time until the church controls every aspect of your life. Including whom your are allowed to love.
But it is difficult to bring this up without immediately being labeled a phob because the LGBT owns non-straight sexuality and if you criticize the movement, you criticize all the non straight people.
BLM has similar vibes.
I just don’t like groups. Churches, political groups, grassroots movements, you name it. It all ends up the same in the end. With group pressure, control, shaming and ostracizing when you don’t toe the line.
If I learned anything in my 20s, its that being a part of any ideological groups is not in your best interest. No matter how good and safe it feels in the beginning.
blahaj.zone basically
Turns into an authoritarian cult. You’re either completely with them or fully against them
You’re other with them or a tankie.
What?
I don’t think they are the only ones on this platform, tbh xD I will say that I have run into some chill blåhaj people here and I have run into people who are affiliated with entirely different instances or what you call them that have displayed some of the most unhinged, unpleasant behavior I have experienced online. I was so close to just delete myself from this platform and forget about having any online social outlet after a series of interactions with particularly disgusting individuals on here. I can kind of see why they were banned off of reddit, ngl. I haven’t interacted enough with blåhaj people to say if they are as bad as that or not. Seems like a mixed bag to me.
The most pleasant people on here that I have met have mostly been my fellow Danes and all the Linux people. For whatever reason, the Linux fanatics just tend to be super welcoming and encouraging which statistically shouldn’t be the case. All lived experience tells me that groups that are obsessed with a specific topic/lifestyle are usually some of the worst people to be around. Doesn’t matter the subject. But somehow these nerds manage to be chill. 😆
I have run into some chill blåhaj people here
I mean I have met many chill lemmy.ml, lemmygrad and hexbear users. They’re just a pain when you talk about their specific topics. The same applies to blahaj users. The main issue is ada, the instance admin of blahaj
I’ve had these conversations with people before. I was telling a fellow man how I don’t care if my partner is bi. He said something like “woah man, there can be some major trust issues there” implying that her “homosexual needs” will lead her to cheat on me with my sister or something. I didn’t follow his logic.
I’m a straight male. My wife is bi. The most important part of her orientation, to me, is that it means everyone else was my competition for her love instead of just other men, but I still won.
That’s always how I looked at it.
As if straight/gay people don’t cheat all the time because they’re apparently not getting their “needs” met. The person being shitty is the issue, not their sexuality.
Exactly.
I wouldn’t say “the left” but biphobia is absolutely insane among non traitor lunatics.
biphobia is prevalent even among gays and lesbians. It sucks.
Absolutely. My wife was bisexual and many lesbians wanted nothing to do with her.
but it’s a good thing if it happened when she was your wife (if you’re exclusive ofc)
The funniest part about this to me is that the AIDs epidemic actually forced medical researchers to accept that sometimes guys have sex with other guys, and they even created the term “Men who have Sex with Men” or MSM to cover this fact, since they aren’t necessarily gay or bi.
Like, society needs to get over this. Sometimes people have sex with other people. Sometimes they happen to be different genders, sometimes they’re the same. It only means whatever it means to the people fucking and little else
Did they say no homo first?
No but they kept their socks on so it’s good
Am I weird if I like to keep my socks on?
I had a gay friend who up on learning of that “get out of gay free card” said “well shit I guess I’ve been straight all this time!”
The no homo spell kills aids.
It makes me bifurious
I chuckled under my breath
I exhaled a little more air than usual through my nose
I smiled but my breathing remained unchanged
How dare you
Bread makes you fat?!
i do wild shit to make the girls im dating lose attraction for me all the time. burping really loud constantly, saying the word “COCKS” when i sneeze, crying about wall-e, shitting with the door open. who cares?
all I see are green flags
You are my hero.
Watch him as he goes.
The door is open after all
Anon wants that BUSSY without social stigmas. Based and gay.
Fucking a twink is the manliness thing a man can do and if anyone wants to disagree with that I’ll fuck you too and I’m straight as fuck.
Twinks are feminine, so fucking a twink is also feminine and that’s gay. The manliest thing you can do is fuck the manliest guy you can find.
Coincidentally, that is also what you should do on your first day in prison. Or so they told me, I dunno
EDIT: Wait… was it beat OFF the manliest guy or beat UP? Hmmm… doesn’t matter. Everybody liked me after anyway.
The manliest thing you can do is being fucked by Kronar.
Been looking for this recently. Thank you!
I’m sorry, but you are completely wrong
;)
Reminds me of this stand up bit.
I just want to fuck a bloke, man
Initial reaction: there’s no way that’s real
After reading the comments: what the fuck
Very strange you haven’t absorbed this concept yet. “Bi women are straight but bi men are gay” is one of the most common tropes in the larger culture’s conception of sexual identity.
I don’t mean to brag, but I have an astonishing lack of culture.
bisexual women are hot
bisexual men are gross.
that’s the underlying assumption.
homosexuality is considered positive/attractive among women, and normalized. a woman doesn’t become less woman for being with a woman.
however, works the opposite for a guy. homosexuality makes a man less manly, or something.
Imagine being a dude and caring if people thought you were manly or not.
Recommended reading: “Bi: Notes for a Bisexual Revolution”, by Shiri Eisner
I’m in my mid thirties, and I’m a bi woman who tends to go for bi men. I was once chatting about one of my exes with my dad and same aged stepsister, when she expressed deep surprise that I would be willing to date a man who had dated a man. My dad agreed, which is par for the course, but I could not for the life of me get a believable answer from my stepsister as to why that would be a dealbreaker.
She had been part of the GSA in one of the most progressive towns in America and was at that time in first cohort of women to join a previously men-only fraternity at her college, so she definitely falls under the progressive umbrella.
I literally can’t think of a reason except for donating blood, but that wasn’t it.
I mean you kinda said the reason yourself: “[she] join[ed] a previously men-only fraternity at her college”. Of course I’m only speculating.
The people she surrounded herself with probably thought that way and thus she thought that way. Most people do not think critically about their beliefs very much, yes even most progressives are just progressives because of the people around them.
Tbh, the fraternity was pretty inclusive. It wasn’t required that they go coed, they just decided to. I do wonder what she’s like now that she’s a lot further removed from her hometown, but I know she’s at least still heavily anti-trump.
So, this woman is an asshole and you big brained your way to blaming men for it??? lol Did you get a temp ban from Reddit or something?
I literally can’t think of a reason except for donating blood, but that wasn’t it.
What is the correlation between donating blood and being homophobic ?
Gay and bi men are often excluded from donating due to higher HIV risk I believe.
For a long time (at least through the late 2010s and possibly still now, I’m no longer a good candidate to donate for other reasons), you couldn’t donate if you were a man who had sex with men (MSM) or if you had had sex with a MSM recently (6 months-2 years). Your own condom use was irrelevant.
I did once decide to stick with hands only with someone because I had an appointment to donate blood later that week. My stepsister wasn’t aware of that restriction though and I can’t imagine it’s the presiding reason why a lot of even queer women aren’t interested in bi men, given the demographics of blood donation.
There are a lot of wild things that preclude you from donating blood depending on where you live though, including time spent in the UK during the mad cow disease spike, even if you were a vegan. I understand that blood donation organizations are working with such large numbers and such a small margin for error that they would rather exclude a thousand good candidates than let one bad candidate donate, but it ends up being extremely discriminatory. I looked for some recent numbers, and it is true that even today the majority of new HIV cases occur in MSM or people who have sex with MSM, but given how widespread HIV suppression treatment is (in the US), correct condom usage reduces that risk to nearly zero.
The FDA actually revised their donor rules for LGBT donors, so many blood donation places, the red cross for example, no longer have this restriction.
It may be a byproduct of some dating issues from before her time dating that got passed down to her. Namely, that lots of gay men were in the closet, and ended up leaving their wife/girlfriend when they came out. And that could have carried through to women thinking it was that, because it’s easier to think the person leaving you doesn’t want women, not just doesn’t want you.
Hopefully that mentality just disappears on its own after awhile. I think it’s already on its way out.
