I know my family needs me, but honestly they would realize after a couple years that they’re actually better off with the stress that is me. But my dog needs me right now, so for now I’m here.
Every day:
‘I really want to die.’
‘We can’t though. And our cat needs us.’
Sigh. ‘Yeah.’
This is so real. My cat needs someone to clean her chin acne and remember to give her anti hairball paste, and to trim her nails. A bunch of friends of friends on my Plex server need me to keep it working so they can watch all the latest movies.
They’re motivating, for sure.
I’ve also looked up how long she could live on my corpse.
I also know I don’t want her to have to do that. People don’t like adopting cats who have eaten people, so that would narrow her prospects.
So final answer, cat needs me.
Hey idk if this will help you but my cats chin acne cleared up when I switched her to grain free food. It was an allergy reaction in her case.
But even if it does help she still needs all that other stuff, and none of us ever get younger so she’ll only need you more :)
Thanks for the tip! Our vet actually recommended grain inclusive food I think related to her kidneys and urine results, but she had acne since before that - plus it’s mostly gone ever since we switched to a set of metal bowls that we wash after 1 use, and a brief period of regular cleaning with chlorhexidine wipes. These days I mostly just check on it once a month and periodically brush her chin to get rid of any loose blackheads since the large embedded ones are long gone.
That’s super fair and I’m glad she has you looking out for her! It seems to be caused by a lot of things and you just do your best to handle it.
I did something similar with my cats, but I basically found a whole box of saucers (like for under a coffee/tea cup) my mom bought back in the day, an “unbreakable” resteraunt variety, where buying the whole box was cheaper than buying a set of 12, because nobody wants them (why I didn’t sell them)
So I have a stack that lasts about a week and a half of 4 plates daily (two cats each get 8am and 8pm). I just throw them in the dishwasher rather than daily washing. I’m very lazy. But I also live alone so it gets me to run my dishwasher before I’m entirely out of dishes.
Ooh yeah our dishwasher is usually 1/4 full of the cat dishes lol, we do the same, the more frequent runs mean we don’t have to worry as much about running rinse cycles for dried on stuff. I couldn’t live without a dishwasher
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Try double depression! Double the fun… I mean, double the… well, it’s just double.
Yeah I’ve got a bout of the ol’ suicidal depression too. 90% of my (unprompted) thoughts are of violence and death.
None of the meds help. Neither does therapy, much.
Fun times.
Outdourcing helps me to some degree. Putting the depression into music, that kind of thing. Not a cure by any means but it helps me to gain a different perspective and fight anhedonia. It’s important to keep moving, to keep the momentum. Because momentum will make you take a shower and eat.
It’s such an unfortunate name, too, because people, reasonably, assume double must mean “two of the same thing” and in this case it just… doesn’t.
It was just a bad joke. Of course does dysthymia bring in some variation.
Heard this banger of an interview question with a goth band’s drummer:
“What’s the coolest way you’d wanna die?”
“I really don’t give a shit, as long as it happens right-fucking-now.”
Being miserable can become “comfortable” in a way that makes feeling any other way a little nerve wracking.
When I gave that shitty little voice a name and yelled at it to shut the fuck up whenever it spoke it actually helped a little
My therapist asked me to name the voice and try to be compassionate to it. The only thing I could think to name it was stupid fucking bitch, so I guess you could say I’m winning at therapy.
what do you call it?
Steve
fuck, this hits hard
Every morning when I open my eyes I’m disappointed. I don’t want you be here.
I get this.
Yup. The desire to cease existing is always at the forefront of everything.
That’s just a “there goes my brain being mean” again moment. Scold it and move along.
It helps to put on some upbeat eighties music, like van halen’s 1984.
The year before I even existed. I like where your head’s at.
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Just look at the things you enjoy, whether that be comics, games, etc. Make new hobbies, I have been less and less depressed as I aged because I keep finding new things to enjoy, now my sadness of death is mostly because I don’t think I can consume all the content/entertainment out there before i die, but it’s easy to hop on to the next distraction with that mentality. NGL gooning lowkey helps, remembering hot girls exist weirdly makes me believe in the idea of a god. Like idk about yall but no afterlife is what gets me depressed, and idk maybe a god does exist, logically theyd simulate us properly, evolving us to become more in their shape overtime, sometimes I just go off on tangents to distract myself from thinking about mortality, like now, i wonder if humans become godlike through some psychic shit if our brains keep evolving and the end goal is for their to be more godlike beings many many years from now. See not thinking about depressing shit, now i’ve confused my brain thoroughly.
And if you don’t read, start, nothing pulls me out of a hole more than other people’s thoughts
That Twitter handle fire tho
