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MacN'Cheezus@lemmy.today to Greentext@sh.itjust.works · 13 days ago

Anon is Bri’ish

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Anon is Bri’ish

lemmy.today

MacN'Cheezus@lemmy.today to Greentext@sh.itjust.works · 13 days ago
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  • NOT_RICK@lemmy.world
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    13 days ago

    Cunt.

    • MacN'Cheezus@lemmy.todayOP
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      13 days ago

      U wot m8?

    • zaphod@sopuli.xyz
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      13 days ago

      You got a loicence for that?

      • otacon239@lemmy.world
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        13 days ago

        • pohart@programming.dev
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          13 days ago

          You can. But it’s not required.

          • thegreatloofa@lemmy.world
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            13 days ago

            The fuck it isn’t

        • doingthestuff@lemy.lol
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          13 days ago

          But you need a license to do it in the UK. Unless you’re a refugee, then none of the regular standards apply.

          • ddplf@szmer.info
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            13 days ago

            Unless you’re a refugee, then none of the regular standards apply.

            Fuck off.

      • WIZARD POPE💫@lemmy.world
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        13 days ago

        • sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works
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          12 days ago

          Seems someone isn’t a Brit.

    • clif@lemmy.world
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      12 days ago

      Beat me to it (by 24+ hours) ya cunt.

      • NOT_RICK@lemmy.world
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        12 days ago

        You’re one late cunt

  • pi3r8@lemmy.world
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    13 days ago

    The irony of this image being censored .

    • crimeschneck∈🇩🇪⊂🇪🇺@sopuli.xyz
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      13 days ago

      You have to verify your age to see the uncensored image.

      • Socsa@sh.itjust.works
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        13 days ago

        drinks verification can

        • Billegh@lemmy.world
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          13 days ago

          It’s an older meme, sir. But it checks out. We were going to let it pass.

      • Darren@sopuli.xyz
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        12 days ago

        Brit here. I can see the uncensored image through a VPN. For which I have a licence, obviously.

    • sbv@sh.itjust.works
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      13 days ago

      No swearing license

    • fibojoly@sh.itjust.works
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      13 days ago

      Especially since cunt isn’t even a swearword in English.

      • breecher@sh.itjust.works
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        13 days ago

        It is definitely an American who censored it.

      • pi3r8@lemmy.world
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        11 days ago

        It’s practically punctuation here in Scotland.

      • bampop@lemmy.world
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        12 days ago

        You must be thinking of Australian

      • WhyIHateTheInternet@lemmy.world
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        13 days ago

        My wife just told me otherwise.

    • maxwells_daemon@lemmy.world
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      12 days ago

      But think of the children

    • MacN'Cheezus@lemmy.todayOP
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      13 days ago

      It was already like this when I found it.

  • moakley@lemmy.world
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    12 days ago

    Emphatically uncensored:

    • WhyIHateTheInternet@lemmy.world
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      Oi! You got a permit for that uncensored meme?

      • Knock_Knock_Lemmy_In@lemmy.world
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        12 days ago

        Yes, but You have to take a photo of your ID and share it with a random website to prove you are old enough to read the 18+ word Cunt.

      • bampop@lemmy.world
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        12 days ago

        The first was offensive enough. Quite sure I saw a “bl##dy” and maybe even a “b##tard” in there as well. I’m shocked, shocked I tell you. I’m going to write to my MP and demand to be protected from this kind of thing

    • MacN'Cheezus@lemmy.todayOP
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      13 days ago

      Was that necessary?

      • BipolarSilence@lemmy.cafe
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        13 days ago

        Who in the actual fuck censors a 4Chan post

        A 4CHAN POST

      • untorquer@lemmy.world
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        13 days ago

        Writing cunt in Union Jack filled text? This is British cultural heritage!

        • MacN'Cheezus@lemmy.todayOP
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          12 days ago

          Okay then

          • untorquer@lemmy.world
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            12 days ago

            I don’t know why you’re taking flak though. Very silly.

          • Darren@sopuli.xyz
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            12 days ago

            You got a loicence for that capitulation, m8?!

      • moakley@lemmy.world
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        12 days ago

        It’s my new hobby.

      • olenko@feddit.nl
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        13 days ago

        I literally couldn’t make out the word

        • moakley@lemmy.world
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          12 days ago

          You’re right. I adjusted it.

      • ObjectivityIncarnate@lemmy.world
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        12 days ago

        To make that joke? No.

        To make the joke, having already decided to make it, as funny as possible? Yes.

      • BipolarSilence@lemmy.cafe
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        13 days ago

        deleted by creator

        • MacN'Cheezus@lemmy.todayOP
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          13 days ago

          It wasn’t me, I swear.

          https://lemmy.today/comment/18397391

  • lessthanluigi@lemmy.sdf.org
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    13 days ago

    I can’t believe the TV license is real. I just can’t. I guess it helps makes good tv tho

    • MacN'Cheezus@lemmy.todayOP
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      The TV license is definitely real. All the others are fake though (I believe).

      https://www.gov.uk/find-licences/tv-licence

      • Bobby Turkalino@lemmy.yachts
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        A TV Licence costs £174.50

        Wtf is this in addition to paying for cable/satellite?

        • Jade@programming.dev
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          Nope. You can just plug your TV into the aerial to get BBC + free channels. Netflix and whatever costs extra tho

          • MacN'Cheezus@lemmy.todayOP
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            I’m surprised that according to the website, they actually let you get away without a license if you only use commercial streaming services and don’t watch any BBC content. In Germany, that excuse doesn’t fly. As long as your device has the capacity to receive aerial broadcast, you have to pay, whether you watch it or not is irrelevant.

            • Knuschberkeks@leminal.space
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              13 days ago

              afaik in Germany you even have to pay if you have no device that to receive anything. Every household has ro pay wirth a few exeptions.

              • MacN'Cheezus@lemmy.todayOP
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                13 days ago

                Pretty sure not owning ANY broadcast receiving devices is the only way to get around it, but that’s extremely difficult to accomplish. Keep in mind radio counts as well (though you can be eligible for a reduced rate if you only have radio access and no TV), including the one in your car, your stereo, or your alarm clock. Owning a TV with no antenna hooked up does not count either, since it’s trivial to do so, and you could just be hiding an antenna in your attic or your basement.

                Basically, the only way to legally skirt the fee is to live under a bridge or in a forest without any electronic devices besides a flash lamp.

            • Shadowedcross@sh.itjust.works
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              13 days ago

              In theory, but the BBC has been known to harass people into paying, even pressuring you into letting them into your house even though they don’t have the right to do so.

          • Bobby Turkalino@lemmy.yachts
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            13 days ago

            I mean we have free over the air TV here in the states too, just don’t need a loicense for it

            • Darren@sopuli.xyz
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              12 days ago

              Yes, and it’s ad-riddled nonsense.

              The BBC runs no adverts, save for trailers of its own stuff.

              • Bobby Turkalino@lemmy.yachts
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                Yeah and even cable/satellite, paid services, are ad-riddled lol. Always kills me how the older generations criticize us for being financially irresponsible when they’re paying to watch a service that’s 20-25% ads

        • lessthanluigi@lemmy.sdf.org
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          13 days ago

          Brexit really was a mistake

          • Log in | Sign up@lemmy.world
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            12 days ago

            Very much so indeed, but I’m not sure why you mentioned it?

        • Deceptichum@quokk.au
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          Do people elsewhere in the world pay for “cable” tv? I know we had a version here in Australia but it was so rare, no one really used it.

          • Bobby Turkalino@lemmy.yachts
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            It was pretty big over here in the US, and still is with Gen X and older. Nowadays, pretty much the only reasons to get it are if you’re a sports fan or enjoy brainrot 24/7 news networks

      • MachineFab812@discuss.tchncs.de
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        13 days ago

        The long knife prohibition is real.

        • Log in | Sign up@lemmy.world
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          12 days ago

          True, but there’s no such thing as a knife licence.

          • MachineFab812@discuss.tchncs.de
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            11 days ago

            I mean, yes, but I was more referencing that there was exactly one other thing of any substance besides the TV thing in this greentext.

      • Mac@mander.xyz
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        12 days ago

        (i believe)

        Best joke in this thread

        • MacN'Cheezus@lemmy.todayOP
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          12 days ago

          Thanks for noticing me, Senpai.

    • funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works
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      Americans fund public TV and radio infrastructure through taxes, Brits just make it opt-out if you meet certain criteria by labeling it as a license.

      You tell me which has more “freedom.”

      • lessthanluigi@lemmy.sdf.org
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        The one where I don’t have to upload my I.D. to watch porn, BABY! 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🦅🦅

        • lewis6991@lemmy.world
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          13 days ago

          I’ll just leave this here https://worldpopulationreview.com/state-rankings/porn-site-verification-states

          • lessthanluigi@lemmy.sdf.org
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            Sometimes I forget how much freedoms we have in Washington State. The only thing is strict gun laws, but it’s mostly background checks and limited magazine sizes

            • ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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              Limited mag sizes are a legit issue, but NICs checks are federal.

              The only thing limited mags are effective against is the possibility to have more rounds in a home defense situation (which is really only a problem if there are multiple invaders, but of course there usually are, that’s not usually a solo activity).

              Their stated objective (to reduce the amount of rnds/mag so mass shooters are less effective) is complete hogwash, magazines can be changed in one literal second, and sometimes the shooters even prefer the 10-20rnd mags because the standard 30s are harder to hide. Changing mags is only a problem when someone is returning fire, if you’re completely unimpeded you might as well have a damn lever action.

              • sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works
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                And it’s not like mass shooters are law abiding citizens except in the small area of murdering random people… They can easily drive one state over to Idaho and get whatever they want, and if they’re out, continue south to Utah or east to Montana. Nobody is going to check your car on the way back…

                I grew up in WA, and everyone got around whatever law they didn’t like. Want to blow up big fireworks but your town doesn’t allow it? Go to the local res, hide them under a blanket in the car, and be a very law abiding citizen on the way home (and blow them up in a random neighborhood). Before weed was legal, people would just grow it in the forest on public land, which was literally everywhere.

                The mag law just exists to piss off law abiding citizens and is the same “save the children” BS excuse that’d being used to effectively ban porn and other things across the country. Solve the problem another way.

                • ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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                  Tbh you don’t even have to drive, you can 3d print standard capacity magazines and then use a spring, which you can buy in any state, or cannibalize one from another mag (certain mags that can be legally bought in restricted states work too, but a man has to keep some secrets).

                  But also yeah driving works too, and plenty people have done it.

                  I grew up elsewhere, but have similar experiences regarding weed, fireworks, and more. Laws don’t stop people from doing anything they’re significantly intent on doing in my experience.

                  Totally agree, and I extend that to all the pointless feature bans. Their true purpose is for politicians to posture for reelection lol, same with the anti-porn bullshit, just different politicians.

        • funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works
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          13 days ago

          well I live in Georgia (US state) who brought it in before the UK did.

    • rtxn@lemmy.world
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      The early idea was to support the state-owned and state-operated channels through taxes. Then the channels got privatized and now the taxes are going straight into the pockets of The Brexit Bunch. I mean why would they voluntarily cut off a money source that people were already paying.

      • UncleGrandPa@lemmy.world
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        In San Diego they had a toll bridge… once it was paid for they kept the toll. When asked why they were still charging a toll… They said the toll booths still cost money to run. They had to be sued for the toll to stop

        • nialv7@lemmy.world
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          Having to charge toll because they need money to run the toll booths is the most Kafkaesque thing I have heard in a while.

    • schnurrito@discuss.tchncs.de
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      This is/was a thing in many other European countries too.

      In Austria it used to be (not long ago, a few years at most) that only people who owned a TV needed to pay it, not anymore, now every household has to pay it, so it is basically a household tax.

      • алсааас [she/they]@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        It’s not a tax tho? At least not in Germany. It’s going directly to the state-broadcasting service but unconditionally; the idea being it’s harder to influence the content or threaten them with cutting off their funding.

        • schnurrito@discuss.tchncs.de
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          This is also the case in Austria according to https://orf.beitrag.at/faq/allgemein so whether to call that a “tax” or not is purely a terminological question. It used to be that this was only required for owning a TV, but this was hard to enforce because there was no automatic legal requirement to let inspectors into one’s home and companies started to produce TVs without a TV tuner (i.e. could only stream from the Internet) to get around this.

  • markovs_gun@lemmy.world
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    I’m really glad I didn’t have to see the word cunt here that would have really ruined my day

  • maxwells_daemon@lemmy.world
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    Oi, you got yer internet licence, mate? Can’t be crackin’ these jokes if you ain’t a proper grown-up, innit?

  • Agent641@lemmy.world
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    Armed units show up and arrest the stabbed bobby for not having a dying license

  • cub Gucci@lemmy.today
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    This is not the UK Alan Turing died for

    • porksnort@slrpnk.net
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      Much too soon! (but totally a good one, i ill be stealing this one)

  • Chev@lemmy.world
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    Who is Bobby?

    • MacN'Cheezus@lemmy.todayOP
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      British colloquial term for constable

      • WhyJiffie@sh.itjust.works
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        is that the same as gendarme?

    • Nosavingthrow@lemmy.world
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      5-0

    • GraniteM@lemmy.world
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      Your uncle.

    • sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works
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      12 days ago

      fuzz

  • QueenHawlSera@sh.itjust.works
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    I say this as an American. The UK is not ran by adults

    • breecher@sh.itjust.works
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      You would indeed be an expert on the subject.

      • QueenHawlSera@sh.itjust.works
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        Thing is, the UK seems to be ran by literal children whereas USA at least has edgy teenagers

  • unalivejoy@lemmy.zip
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    Fake: British cops don’t carry guns

    Gay: Op is sleeping with dudes

    • MacN'Cheezus@lemmy.todayOP
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      Fellas, is it gay if you’re male and you sleep by yourself?

      • ignoble_stigmas@sh.itjust.works
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        13 days ago

        Only if you like it

        • idriss@lemmy.ml
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          deleted by creator

  • Aeao@lemmy.world
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    My morning as a Texan

    Knock on the door… I open the door with my 1911 cocked locked and ready to rock.

    It’s a sheriff with his own drawn. He goes to shoot my dog but the dog pulls a beretta. We laugh at the dog for his immigrant gun.

    Sheriff tells me there’s trouble at the watering hole so I ride out to grab bubba.

    I shoot my horse because I was pretty sure it hurt its leg later and grab one of the many spares roaming around…

    Head to the watering hole to see an Italian man in a native headdress…

    Shoot him because it was my right as an American

    It was my Pa.

  • алсааас [she/they]@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    Br*t angloid self-censorship LOL

    • breecher@sh.itjust.works
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      That was definitely done by an American. A Brit would not censor that.

      • алсааас [she/they]@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        Sound logic, I stand corrected

    • Log in | Sign up@lemmy.world
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      I’ll wager that this meme was not censored by a Brit.

  • thearch@sh.itjust.works
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    11 days ago

    honestly, the sleeping licence and tv licence are one thing, but an unregistered butterknife? that’s just asking for trouble. where’s the respect for law and order?

  • zululove@lemmy.ml
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    12 days ago

    England need democracy, free speech, and imperial measures NOW

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You are not logged in. However you can subscribe from another Fediverse account, for example Lemmy or Mastodon. To do this, paste the following into the search field of your instance: !greentext@sh.itjust.works

This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you’re new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

  • Anon is often crazy.
  • Anon is often depressed.
  • Anon frequently shares thoughts that are immature, offensive, or incomprehensible.

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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This community can be federated to other instances and be posted/commented in by their users.

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