Hey! Let’s take a selfie with Mikey! He’s so small this year, let’s all sit together around him! I remember as a kid Mikey was so big!

Now we know what is more profitable:

https://lemmy.world/post/27585832

Forget batteries man! Bottles is where its at!

Raccoons can’t fart. The struggle is real, scientists say.

Being them back!

Being them all back!

I’m going to Portland or pornland, one of the two.

Screaming? That was a couple of miles ago. Everyone on the tracks was screaming. Then they went quiet. Now its just getting warmer and warmer. Can’t wait to finally get to Auschwitz and take a shower like the guards said to do!

And they get a trial 90 license to fly a jetliner?

Hilarious if true… Or not. Either way!

Just nowing my loan so autocorrect can get a heart attack.

Everytime I now the grass it smells minty!

So we moved.

Because after 7 8 9, 0 probably 8 a bunch of other numbers, but O is even fatter so it probably 8 even more!

How about works of art painted in fentanyl laced gelatin paint?

Just giving you all a hint lol. You could paint an entire car in that.

I’m feeling a little ostrostracized and ex-ousted.

Americans are starting to self deport to discover new worlds.

At work I learned that cyanide is actually very dangerous because it accumulates its effects. Like you have a little now and a little later, then suddenly you can’t get up from bed so you call in sick. Its dangerous stuff.

He was given a trolley problem. Well, it was more of a train problem. Well, I don’t remember where the bottle neck was. But the guy couldn’t get the Jews fast enough to satisfy his evil ambition.

The guy bankrupted a casino, not by playing against it and being super lucky, but by owning it. Virtually everything he has ever touched in business has turned to shit. How do you ever in the living fuck screwup stakes at Costco? My cousin with my be good eye and a working elbow could do it.

And now its the country’s second try. This time unhinged, with all the training wheels off. The guy is stepping on the pedal while stripping the car for parts and giving away the fuel. The guy doesn’t even drive, he just fired the chauffeur and is dismantling the car from the inside with a shot gun…full steam ahead on to a nice brick wall and an infinity cliff ready to take us all with him. And Canada and Mexico and Gina. Three and three quarters of a year more of daily atrocities and law breakage. At least Hitler boy brought back the astronauts.

Just recycle that shit! Here’s my…and address where you can recycle it to…

When we stop fucking, but keep eating, our bodies have to do something.

…c’mon Johnson! Get the fuck up!

…dog in bed: nah, bang bang! Lemmy sleep!