Honestly so happy I’m married, I’m sorry for all of y’all. Dystopian times.
But hey to add my two cents: I think that fear is marketable, so women are over fed on paranoia.
At the same time, porn and propaganda have put bad expectations in some percentile of dumb men.
Both sexes are generally out of social practice, and societal trust is at an all time low. Most people are nice, but most people are also awkward.
So get out there and meet some people, don’t even do so romantically, just go learn how to interact with people, form some friendships.
But hey to add my two cents: I think that fear is marketable, so women are over fed on paranoia.
This is the case with literally everything.
Used to hear about “no-go zones” in Stockholm in my local news a lot, areas where even the Swedish police were afraid to go in to. Then a friend of mine moved to Stockholm and started going to “the worst no-go zone” every weekend to get fresh produce. The only time he felt in danger was when he stumbled upon a drunk countryman.
came back to this thread to find discourse that ISN’T cancer. thank you for your sane and gentle response. if more people had your empathy, less of them would be single and hurting.
Going out nowadays doesn’t work anymore. Things have changed dramatically in the last few decades.
Well what defines going out? There are plenty of board game meet ups, even if you don’t especially like board games I would posit that it’s not an objectively negative experience; so if you must hold you nose and go anyway, do so.
Secondly, although this is coming from my experience in America, so your millage may vary, there’s tons of outdoor activities and groups: go for a hike, go backpacking.
You don’t need special equipment, you don’t need to buy anything. Just a water bottle, backpack, tent/tarp, and some non perishable foods and you’re good to go.
It’s true that the convenient third places of yesterday have seemingly vanished; but people are still out there.
I used to hike a lot but these days it’s incredibly difficult to find people to hike with, they’re usually at least twenty years older than me and not in the best shape anymore which rules out difficult routes. And everywhere else there are masses of stupid tourists and influencers stumbling around in their flip-flops (Because of course you wear flip-flops in the alps!), throwing trash everywhere and yelling into their smartphones when filming themselves which ruins the experience. Board and card game groups also died out in the early 2010s, that was just a short hype. A lot of things disappeared without replacement.
Hmm well I can’t speak for Europe, but plenty of chill people to go hiking with in the US, plus it might not be the most challenging stuff maybe but I’ve hiked out of the grand canyon with my friends 70 yo grandma so if you want the social aspect you can still do challenging things just maybe go a little slower. Also again don’t know about Europe but there are like five weekly board game meetups in my decent sized city.
Isn’t the Grand Canyon also overrun with tourists and influencers?
Man you seem to be very negative about this.
I guarantee you that most tourists don’t even leave the rim of the grand canyon at all. They walk around the visitors center for an hour and go home. Go more than 1000’ down from the rim and it’s not particularly crowded at all.
I can’t comment on Europe, like the previous poster—America has far more wide open wilderness than Europe does in general—but if in the USA there are still countless places where you can backpack for days without seeing a single person. There are also plenty of easier hikes with beautiful views that only see a few visitors a day. Just need to put in the footwork to find them. You won’t find them by staying at home and complaining about other hikers.
That sounds great, I would love to see the Grand Canyon. But here in the alps - you have no idea. It’s ridiculous, there is so much overtourism now, it literally exploded in the last ten years. Now I try to find new areas far away from those people. I wished I had access to one of those ISP maps showing statistics about connected devices. But insects work too, the more insects you encounter, the further you are from “civilization”.
The GRAND Canyon is… actually, very, very, VERY Grand.
It’s a huge place, bigger than any I’ve ever experienced before or since. Considering it “overrun” with… anything would be quite a feat. You could fill it with everyone in America and you’d still have space left over for two or three California Condors.
The alps are not exactly small either. But somehow you keep running into tourists and influencers constantly.
I mean I used to wear flip flops hiking all the time but I’m guessing you mean a different type since I would wear them transitioning between land and water without losing them.
This is what I’m talking about. You don’t go there hiking with flip-flops or sneakers. Or in shorts. Or without emergency bivouac. Or without checking the weather report first. A clear blue sky can turn pitch black in less than twenty minutes with huge temperature drops. People are so out of touch with nature nowadays, they completely underestimate how rough conditions can get. And they’re too lazy to do a just little bit of research.
Hobby clubs are great for meeting new people, just don’t join them for the explicit purpose of meeting potential partners.
Going out to talk with people is now impossible because everyone busy for themselves .
Reminds me of a story. Four scientists, all male, on an expedition in Antarctica, far from any other human being. They set up camp, establish the data link to sync their email, and one of them gets an email spam of the sort “hot women in your area”. The next human female was several hundred kilometers away…
The next human female was several hundred kilometers away…
…and probably more cold than “hot”.
Guarantee you she was hot relative to local environmental temperatures, especially compared to women with a current latitude below 60.
Two scientists met via Tinder in Antartica and matched to each other when they were a 45 min helicopter ride away from each other .
Men looking for women as romantic partners is like searching for potable water in a desert.
When looking for men as romantic partners is like searching for potable water in a SWAMP.
Think you mean ocean, you can get very clean water from bogs
Sweet! More gamers!
How come str8s don’t consult with their local LGBTQ+ friendos? I like playing matchmaker.
Gotta have local friendos first…
(cries in very high cost of living, old rich people area)
Because it doesn’t work. It’s already bad enough with straight people doing it.
Because with the possible exception of the bi’s, you’re all inherently unqualified for the job of setting up a heterosexual relationship. Why don’t you ask straight men to pick out sweaters? Because we’re bad at it at an anatomical level.
Damned if you do, damned if you don’t. Honestly I don’t see what makes chasing after women so special, you men have better things to do in your lives.
So go out there & enjoy your hobbies. Stop wasting your time with this nonsense & trust me; you men will still be hated but at least you’ll be educated.
Chasing is only fun for predators. That’s why it’s such a frustrating and unfulfilling experience for the majority of men.
Predators like you.
You are the epitome of “Look ladies, I’m your one true good man” energy.
UPDATE: Ooof a quick dislike huh, maybe I touched a nerve
Yeah, I know. I’ve been called a rapist for refusing to have sex with women several times. Because that’s what predators do.
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But then women start asking me if I’m gay, wtf is wrong with me and why am I so full of myself whenever I don’t want to date and enjoy solitude
Yeah exactly, notice the homophobia.
Women who fall into this category aren’t even in the dating pool.
He goes off and gets laid. She stays at home. Looks like everything works out. What’s everyone arguing about? Both characters get exactly what they’re signing up for, unless we have some users on Lemmy who really need to touch grass and realize that not every chick is locking their door lmao.
Can I share this in !Womensstuff@piefed.blahaj.zone or !witchesvspatriarchy@lemmy.ca
Of course. It’s not mine, cross post/share away!
Awesome thanks 😊
And don’t forget to tell the other girls we said hi. 🤭
Sure, why not?
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Don’t even think about going there, they’ll kidnap you and sell you for your organs, if not worse, it’s not worth it.
men bad
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This is hilarious because women are purchasing concert tickets of a savage woman beater, Chris Brown, until they’re sold out. He has a sold out show in Toronto tonight.
I guess if you can dance, sing, and look good, women will let you beat other women while they buy tickets to your show.
Let me introduce to you: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hybristophilia
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You risk life and limb crossing the street. It is reasonable to take some precautions like looking both ways or waiting on a walk signal. It is not reasonable to assume every driver will swerve into you when they see an opportunity.
Take care to prepare for the worst for your own safety, but don’t assume the worst in others.
So just need to bio-enhance women to be super strong in order to get dates, got it.
All roads lead to dommy mommy
Isn’t it hilarious that women VASTLY PREFER dating strangers than from within their own social sphere? The phenomenon of "But we’re friends! is a cliche for a reason.
Do you have any statistics backing up that claim or is that purely anecdotal/an subjective assumption?
Again, why is friend zoning such a cliche? Because women usually turn down men they’ve already met.
Okay, so the latter.
Just because a cliché exist does not mean it’s actually true. People that are complaining about a lot on the Internet are maybe more likely to spend too much time on the Internet in general and by that are more likely to have a lack of social skills in the real world.
To counter that anecdotally: in my social circle a lot couples spawned from a previous social connection and there are only a few that meet through dating apps or where a random hook up in the first place.
Women turn down men they’re not attracted to. This has nothing to do with how long they’ve known each other. There is no such thing as the friend zone, just the you-are-not-attractive zone.
Maybe they turn down men they already considered and rejected? Strangers are still being considered.
Turning down people isn’t something bad. It’s worse to end up with someone who don’t fit.
Friendzone though is most often just not having guts to say that loud and clear.
I had a friend that used to bring all her first dates to the bar I tended. Just in case.
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Dating platforms areLIFE is crawling with predatorshe FTFY
Edit: Just to add “predator” is not only the psycho that will kill/rape a woman. Any men that do not accept a NO, that thinks they are “playing hard to get”, that catcalls a woman in the streets, ta makes an unsolicited comment about their body, that thinks woman are ment to do whatever they want… any of those men are predators.
Any men is a comment away from being a predator. Don’t be this man
What if someone were to say, start intentionally spreading rumors about men by claiming they had seen several women raped in their lives? For the sake of population control. That sounds like it would be very effective if I could find a large enough audience.
Of course it doesn’t feel great to think that people are uncomfortable and threatened just being aware that you are a single man who exists in the same environment, but if that’s how it’s gotta be, how do you successfully communicate that you are not a threat?
how do you successfully communicate that you are not a threat?
I don’t.
I’m not interested in socializing with discriminating cretins who deal in absolutes and i like my peace of mind.but if that’s how it’s gotta be, how do you successfully communicate that you are not a threat?
That’s what a predator would say.
No, seriously, trust is built over time.
No, seriously, trust is built over time.
Well yeah, obviously, but why would someone give you the opportunity if being around you makes them uncomfortable and threatened? It works the other way around too; I wouldn’t want to spend time with someone if it seems like doing so might be making them feel afraid, in that case I’m just going to stay away from them.
Pressure quite often. Social pressure, psychological pressure. It can be a form of de-escelation out of fear what would happen if you rejected the person. Not entirely the same situation, but that’s the reason I can’t say no that easily to my alcoholic brother’s shenanigans. Imagine what women go through on a daily basis
Makes sense, but there has to be a better way as that sounds awful, like it does not sound like your alcoholic brother is genuinely building trust with you that way.
No he doesn’t. But it’s the easiest way for me to cope and deal with the situation. I don’t have the patience or the mental fortitude to try and convince or convert my family to abstain from alcohol. I’d rather avoid the situation and look out for my own well-being than be exposed to their drinking. I know it’s not the healthiest strategy, but it’s what’s been helping me the past few years
You people know this is a good thing, right? It’s our population problem regulating itself.
Not going fast enough though so war is still necessary.
That’s psychotic. War is never necessary.
It is regarding population control. We got rid of our natural enemies so now we need to be our own enemy. Even with all those wars it’s not enough. A deadly world war or pandemic (or both combined) would be need.
Or we keep going and ultimately cause the runaway greenhouse effect, killing all life on this planet.
“Be patient out there gentlemen”
Naahhh…just give up on finding anyone
Suicide and loneliness seems like the only answer.
With that attitude.
That’s one thing not worth dying for. Modern humans are meant to be self-sufficient individuals that depend on nothing but the very basics to survive.
What is the point of living so, I think we are getting into the big filter…
You must have your own purpose, completelly independent of others
“Happiness belongs to those who are sufficient unto themselves. For all external sources of happiness and pleasure are, by their very nature, highly uncertain, precarious, ephemeral and subject to chance.” - Arthur Schopenhauer
Truly a well-chosen nickname.
Don’t do it…
Yes
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The weird thing I really don’t have a big issue with that. It’s just that the rhetoric just crushes me because it never ends and it fucks my head up and I start to doubt myself.
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Holy shit, ad blockers are a thing, people. ublock origin and SponsorBlock for a safer, happier life! Browsing anything without blockers is akin to dripping dimethyl mercury on your genitalia, crossing your fingers, and wildly hoping for the best.
Ethyl… Tasty… May I have a sausage too?
Turns out he’s a locksmith.
And he’s a locksmith
for people who doesn't get the joke
Thanks!
