That thing when you accidentally swallow the smallest amount of spit the wrong way and start coughing like mad

The “loosing hair where I want it to grow and growing it where I definitely don’t want it to grow” thing.

Everyone’s saying the need to sleep. That goes a bit too far IMO. Who knows it would work out as we think it to be? Maybe the 33% we sleep will just be reduced off our lifespan with nothing won.
Also, honestly, even if that wouldn’t be the case - I wouldn’t want to not sleep at all. It’s like a regular break from life. Even if employers wouldn’t exploit this, I don’t want to be awake forever.

Now, here’s my proposal: We still need to sleep, but we can control falling asleep and waking up like it’s a muscle. Lay in bed and fall asleep anytime. No more falling-asleep issues for anyone, no more sleepless nights.
And also, we’d have a perfect inner clock and the ability to choose when we wake up. Fall asleep at 11 PM, have to get up at 7? Great, you know exactly when 8hrs are over and are able to just wake up, no alarm needed.

I’m pretty sure everyone can agree that it’s unpleasant.

I strongly disagree.

Personally I’d remove the need for sleep and effectively increase my lifespan by 3rd.

Surprised nobody said cell degradation.

You now can live for as long as you’re not killed whilst physically keeping an appearance of an ~30 y.o. This also technically prevents cancer.

Senescence maybe?

I would like to correct the gut-brain connection. 95% of the time our gut tells our brain that it wants something, and it’s trying to say it wants water, but the brain hears that the gut is hungry.

Shitting feels good… I would just alter it so it doesn’t smell bad, tastes like brownie batter, and isn’t toxic.

Remove the need to exercise, like an anaconda. The ability to just lay around doing nothing and still be ripped to the max. That would be cool!

Surprised nobody’s mentioned adding a 2nd penis yet…

All genitals have eyes now.

I’d like to urinate from my thumbs at will.

Can I add wings? I wouldn’t mind being able to fly around!

Eliminate the need to sleep.

You could pre-empt the need to shit by not having to eat or drink. Honestly, when I lament humanity’s weaknesses I eventually always come back to the fact that we’re creatures in this universe that can only persist if we kill and eat other creatures. How would we be fundamentally changed if that were no longer true?