I wish people stopped putting punchlines before the setup.
It’s like putting Descartes before the whores.
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I think in this case it works well enough.
Most comedy works by subverting expectations. And sometimes you can shift the burden of establishing these expectations to the audience by offering an unclear and vague statement, that later is revealed to be the punchline to the joke.
There is a certain risk involved because how well the joke works on an individual basis is a question of how imaginative or unimaginative the audience is (depending on how the joke is constructed).
A joke that relies on lack of imagination basically turns the audience into their own straight man. While the joke that relies on imagination banks on you being the straight man to the flights of fancy of your audience.
When I was much younger I had heard for the first time a swan circling the shore of my lake in the dead of night. It was this eerie swooshing sound, like huge wings, accompanied by the weirdest nasally grunting. This thing circled the entire lake multiple times, but I could see nothing in the dark.
Now, I was probably just high, as I usually was during that period, but I remember taking to social media to ask if anyone else had “heard something weird flying around the lake” the night before. Unfortunately, people thought I was talking about a UFO, and I wound up being ridiculed for it.
It took me years before I had finally witnessed a swan doing the same thing in the light of day, and was able to finally drop my half-baked fear that Nosferaru had been taking to the skies at night in my lake community.
I was talking about a UFO
you thought it was a ufo? lmao
sry sry i feel the fuck out of that. I’m glad you found your answer- so rarely do we!
I’ve been diving away from swans before, those bastards are pure rage.
Just grab its neck? They weight like 10 kgs, no?
Depends on the age. Fully grown ones can weigh a lot more than 10kg. Source
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Firstly it’s a swan. Secondly the swan fucks you.
I’ve heard their wings can break your arm, so it might not be just as simple as that. Still probably a good first step. But if this happened when he’s out swimming where he can’t stand, that would be an advantage for the swan.
I have been put KO by a chicken when I tried to catch it and it hits me with one of its wing. So I can totally seen a swan fucks you up with his wings.
I think that is a myth. Birds have hollow bones me thinks.
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its probably thier beaks that do the most damage.
I would like my chances… grab it by the neck, swing it like a hammer at the ground
…while swimming?
You’ve definitely never been ambushed and attacked by a swan, those fuckers are crazy, I got in a few fights with the local swans when I was younger, you’d be surprised at how tough those little fuckers are. They’re like upmarket geese.
Canadian geese hiss and that shit can startle the shit out of someone. Imagine hearing a snake out of a goose.
you don’t want to fight a swan, they’re like geese but upscaled. when i was taking photos of them once from a distance, i heard one make a noise like an actual dinosaur. do not fuck with swans, especially if the have their children around
I wouldn’t want to? They are the things known for their agression! And an animal loses all sympathy once it attacks me unprovoked!
He handled that dinosaur like a fucking boss.
Didn’t even need to put his bag down.
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Yea no you didn’t fight people, nor dogs nor did you ever fought that bird! You know that lying about this is super super sad?
Grabbing the also wouldn’t be hard if you actually thought about it! Its fucken largest part of that bird! I distinctly remember a viral video of an old man doing it with ease! And what on earth are you on about how fast it would be? You think its gonna dodge? Its wants to bite you!
Also if an animal were to attack a person unprovoked, it relinquishes any and all right to its wellbeing or even its life!
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You know, its really really really obvious when you are making things in a subject you have no idea about! You wrote and entire chapter to a discussion about you doing the thing we are talking about and you wrote one sentence about not even bothering to make up any circumstances? Oh but you mentioned how strong you are? Fighting people and and and dogs too!
Its fine to imagine that you big big tough boy, its even fine that you jerk off to it! I don’t care, not even that you are apparently into getting your arse kicked by a 10kg bird which has hollowed bones… But its fucking pathetic that you post about it like you are some sort of expert!
Have you fought a goose before? Clearly not considering how you’re mouthing off.
People know to steer clear of Canadian geese for good reason. They’re known to break people’s bones with their wings when they decide you need to be punished. The weight/strength ratio is vastly different for birds than it is for mammals. Birds have to fly, so they’re built ridiculously light for how strong they are - and they have to be strong to be able to fly.
A swan is much bigger and - critically - much meaner than a goose.
You think that cuck fought people and dogs? Really?
According to wiki an adult male canadian goose weights between 3.2-6.5kgs and as all flying birds, it has hollowed bones! (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Canada_goose) And you are telling me that broke an arm? A leg? Lets just pretend to be serious here!
And yes, birds have so powerful pectoral muscles that they even have a specific bone to anchor them (sternum?), alas your arm weights more than the the entire bird! Your leg distinctly weighs more than it!
Around about there yeah, they can get up about 15kg but most are smaller. There are videos of people grabbing them by the neck and putting them back in the water.
But people love to overplay geese and swans as these powerful beasts because of how aggressive and loud they are, and that they can cause bleeding and such with their beak. Some even throw around the idea that they can break your arm. Meanwhile their bones are much smaller and honeycombed. They’re about the strength of a really stale breadstick.
They’re a lot more formidable than you would think. They bite very hard and having much faster reaction time than we do. Their bill is basically a weapon, and they can strike many times a second. We are slow in clumsy in comparison. He won through brute force.
That swan is defending its life and probably it’s family and will do so with every last shred of its existence.
Someone posted a video of an old man doing it with ease?
Apex predator of the lake
Pitty he didn’t have officer Nicholas Angel to help.
You mean Nicholas Angle?
Mornin’ Angle
Mornin’ Angle
Ah! The short-lived Lemmy switcheroo