Spike from Buffy was my crack cocaine for a while there

Girl, yes!!

Those cats were fast as lightning

It’s asking god to bless the people (“us”) and the food (“these thy gifts”) that they’re about to receive from his bounty via jesus

At least that’s how I understood it growing up, but who knows, I was just reciting it by rote as a kid and haven’t thought about it in years haha

Interesting, I learned it as “Bless us, Oh Lord, and these thy gifts”

It’s sewage infrastructure from the 1800s that needs to be repaired - apparently the pipe cracked. I don’t know why it hasn’t been fixed yet, that’s wild.

This is so dumb, I love it

I wanted my name to be Jerrica for a while there

beans

Now you’ve done it…

Breathtaking

We don’t need no water, let the motherfucker burn

It’s super old-timey

Man why you gotta do us like that Oatmeal

… there are only about 350M Americans. She’s saying 74% have been saved.

What a goddamn fucking moron liar.

Regularly? Yes. A one-off? Not the biggest sin.

Poor mom. I bet that was peri/meno brain fog. It sucks.

Don’t you clean your toilet brush after you use it?

I don’t know how the self-checkout is constructed in Belgium, but in the US (at least, the stores I go to), the self-checkout is a small kiosk with a small weight-sensitive platform where you bag your groceries. You’re supposed to scan each item and then place it in the bag so the scale can register it, and then scan and bag the next item, and so on. The problems are that:

1. The technology is buggy and doesn’t always recognize that you’ve bagged an item, so it locks up and won’t let you scan your next item until an attendant comes to assist.
2. Certain items like cooking wine or cough syrup or matches require proof that you’re old enough to purchase it (again, an attendant has to get involved)
3. If god forbid you take a second to rearrange items in one of your bags to make more room for your next item, the stupid machine nags you and then - yep you guessed it - locks up until an attendant comes.
4. The machine-monitored security camera sometimes misinterprets what it sees you doing. For example, one time I was done scanning my items and realized I was still holding onto my shopping list, so I tucked it into my pocketbook as I was getting my credit card out. The camera must’ve thought I was stealing something, so it locked up until an attendant came to review the video footage.
5. The bagging platform is too small for a full week’s worth of groceries, so it’s really only useful if you’re picking up a handful of items, meaning you still need to go through an attended line if you’re doing your weekly shop.

Honestly I prefer bagging my own groceries, and if the problems with self-checkout were fixed, I’d be happy to only do self-checkout. But the way it is now, it’s annoying to use.

LeAnn Rimes with an orange

LeAnn “Rimes with Orange”

LeAnn rhymes with orange

Ken Cheng is a gift