I imagine you cannot think too much about things or too much ahead yes? You have to isolate some parts of your brain and wall the certain thoughts off. Yet you cannot do it completely because you will become too lethargic to care about your safety?

How to dull your instincts just enough to not go mad but not enough to get yourself killed from carelessness that perhaps would arise from separating your psyche from the existential dread completely?

What I mean is that when you are huddled in the trench and things explode around everything screams run and panic but you must separate from that feeling yes while still preserving rational thought and some modicum of self preservation instincts?

Edit: This post isn’t wholly theoretical but part of a mental preparation for increasingly likely war. During which I will most likely volunteer

  • 𝓔𝓶𝓶𝓲𝓮@lemm.eeOP
    0·
    2 days ago

    I kind of am missing self preservation instinct a lot of times yes.

    Which I mean that if something suddenly dangerous is happening I just observe it for some time absent minded before I consciously do something. It seems like a pretty unfortunate trait.

    It’s possible that some drugs fkd me up and I don’t have startle instinct at all or it is seriously diminished.

    Almost crashed car on highway the other day because I had to consciously brake and steer away which I did after some delay while feeling exactly nothing

    • SineIraEtStudio@midwest.social
      0·
      2 days ago

      I think it’s good that you are willing to join up if the Russians invade.

      However, I don’t think “I yearn to kill people” is a good mentality to have. What happens if a war doesn’t come and you don’t have the option of killing “Russians”. What “lesser” people is that desire going to be transferred to?

      I’m not saying Russia isn’t a threat or that Russian culture isn’t problematic (you can check my comment history to see I am very pro-Ukrainian). I just don’t think the desire to kill should be your motivator.

      I would suggest you try and move more towards something more positive like wanting to protect others, which may happen to have you kill russians in some circumstances.

      Regardless of anything above, I hope you are able to stay healthy and Russia never invades another country.