• Brodysseus@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    3 days ago

    I went because I was so desperate to get sober I didn’t know what else to do. Years later I still pop in to see some friends. Its a classic case of selection bias (the people who stay).

    There were some interesting figures in the early aa that got drowned out. Bill w himself loved hallucinogens and thought they held promise.

    I hate that courts make people go there. So so so fucked up because its religious, despite what they say.

    I dont know if you could try something else over zoom to sign your court cards like SMART or recovery dharma but my atheist self found both of those more palatable, I even did the facilitator training for SMART.

    Either way, good luck and im sorry youre forced to go

    • wolfinthewoods@lemmy.ml
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      3 days ago

      Thanks for the kind words!

      Yes, I did get into SMART for a time. I found that it was easier to just go to AA since I didn’t feel like going through the hassle of maintaining a digital form and having to print it out every time I had to show it to my probation officer.

      There have been a lot of successful lawsuits contesting the legality of mandating AA through the courts, in fact, no lawsuit has lost to date. I would have loved to contest it as well, but honestly I live in a small town and the police and courts here are the type to hold a grudge, so I didn’t want to draw any unwanted attention. But yeah, it is most definitely a religious organization, no matter how much they try to maintain they aren’t.

      I had a similar experience myself, I was desperate and was looking for a way out. I initially joined before being mandated by the court, and for a little while I was on board, but after a year or so I got fed up with the methodology and rhetoric of AA. About six months before the mandate I was pretty much through with AA, and then I got a DUI and was forced to go. Which just further brought out my distaste for AA.

      Luckily I’m just about finished with the court requirements. I only have a few more weeks of outpatient, and was told by my PO that once I completed the outpatient I’d be off of probation. So, very happy it’ll be over soon.

      The positive thing was that I did take a break from abusing alcohol and resassessed my relationship with alcohol. I don’t intend to stay abstinent, but I do plan on having a healthier relationship with drinking and being mindful of when and how much I do.

      • Brodysseus@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        3 days ago

        Thats great, contrary to aa doctrine I do believe moderation is possible. I tried moderation and I had no luck, but I’ve known others who made it work. Abstinence is always there if its a hassle to moderate, good luck and be safe!

        • wolfinthewoods@lemmy.ml
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          3 days ago

          For me it took getting into therapy and realizing why I would lose control and drink to excess. I understand now that, for me, excessive drinking is a physical manifestation of an underlying problem I’m not confronting. If I drink when I’m not in pain or emotionally distraught, I drink responsibly, but when I am angry/sad/depressed I’ll drink uncontrollably. I liken it to taking hallucinogens, specifically mushrooms, if I take mushrooms when I am already feeling bad emotionally, I will have a bad trip, if I take them when I am already happy and in a good mood, I’ll have a good trip. It’s about being mindful about your state of mind and what you put in your body that can effect that state of mind.

          I appreciate the kindness, take care too ;)