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Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net to Greentext@sh.itjust.worksEnglish · 28 days ago

Anon is dehydrated

slrpnk.net

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Anon is dehydrated

slrpnk.net

Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net to Greentext@sh.itjust.worksEnglish · 28 days ago
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  • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 @pawb.social
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    28 days ago

    2 hours later, anon vomits up poopy water.

    • irelephant [he/him]@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      28 days ago

      why did you comment this

      • ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.de
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        28 days ago

        Cause South park taught us that’s how it works.

    • Lka1988@sh.itjust.works
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      28 days ago

      You made a conscious choice to post this comment.

      What a terrible day to have eyes.

      • voracitude@lemmy.world
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        28 days ago

        You think that ruined your day? I had LASIK - I paid to read that more clearly.

        • Lka1988@sh.itjust.works
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          28 days ago

          I wear glasses, so I also paid to read it more clearly. Arguably a fraction of what you paid, but the principle remains.

          • Obi@sopuli.xyz
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            28 days ago

            Glasses require replacements, I’m actually curious now whether I’ve paid more than LASIK over my lifetime…

            • Justas🇱🇹@sh.itjust.works
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              28 days ago

              My LASIK (SMARTSurface, but similar enough) cost 1000 euros and my glasses used to cost 350 and I would replace them every three years. My procedure should pay off in 9 years and I am 4 years on the way there.

    • festnt@sh.itjust.works
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      28 days ago

      after that, anon’s insides will be cleaner than the outside (4channers don’t shower)

  • empireOfLove2@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    28 days ago

    The colon is literally designed to reabsorb water left in the stool from digestive processes so he legit probably just drank it

    Enemas usually include things like glycerin that stop this and force the bowels to evacuate

    • Omega@discuss.online
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      28 days ago

      it fucked his gut biome though, that much water coming in pressurised and without treatment is fucked

      • logos@sh.itjust.works
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        26 days ago

        Don’t think that’s in your colon.

    • Akasazh@feddit.nl
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      28 days ago

      I’m curious if this could lead to water poisoning, but I’m unsure what search prompt to use nor unwilling to commit that to my search history.

      • iSeth@lemmy.ml
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        28 days ago

        Water intoxication

  • ch00f@lemmy.world
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    28 days ago

    We can also breathe through our butts. Nothing new here. https://www.theguardian.com/science/2024/sep/12/ig-nobel-prize-goes-to-team-who-found-mammals-can-breathe-through-anuses

    • peoplebeproblems@midwest.social
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      28 days ago

      Can… Fish absorb oxygen by butt too?

      • Billegh@lemmy.world
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        28 days ago

        Not your butt. Maybe theirs…

        • D_C@sh.itjust.works
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          28 days ago

          What if the fish ‘swims’ up my butt?

          • stray@pawb.social
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            28 days ago

            There’s a fish/eel critter that lives that way inside sea cucumbers.

      • MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip
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        28 days ago

        Some fish “talk” by farting.

    • untorquer@lemmy.world
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      27 days ago

      The glutes are poorly optimized even for atmospheric propulsion but the frontiers of knowledge must be advanced.

  • halvar@lemy.lol
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    28 days ago

    If the Human Body would crumble from childish injuries like this we wouldn’t have been destined to rule over Mother Earth

    • MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip
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      28 days ago

      We are not.

    • MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip
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      28 days ago

      We are not.

  • QueenHawlSera@sh.itjust.works
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    28 days ago

    Interesting, I didn’t know I could drink water anally. I kinda want to for fetish reasons now

    • BowtiesAreCool@lemmy.world
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      28 days ago

      This is actually a survival technique if you have water than may not be quite potable to drink, you can essentially drink through your ass and not get sick

      • tigeruppercut@lemmy.zip
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        28 days ago

        Ass chugging for health sounds sus but I don’t know enough about butt hydration to dispute it

        • Obi@sopuli.xyz
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          28 days ago

          It sounds logical to me that you wouldn’t get sick, after all your poop isn’t exactly sterile and so your colon is already shielding you from absorbing the bad stuff from it. What I question is how much hydration you’ll really gain, you definitely absorb some since some folks can get drunk by dipping a tampon in vodka and putting it up there but I dunno about water…

          • lad@programming.dev
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            28 days ago

            In a different thread someone said that it’s the opposite, you better drink the water because that would at least pose a chance of killing some threats, whereas if you butt-drink it it will be guaranteed to deliver everything as is

            • Gumby@lemmy.world
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              28 days ago

              So I guess if I’m ever in a survival situation and this scenario comes up, it’ll be Schrodinger’s Buttchug

              • Log in | Sign up@lemmy.world
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                28 days ago

                Internet comment of the day right there.

              • UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml
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                27 days ago

                Do both

          • MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip
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            28 days ago

            Colon is really good at dehydrating. That’s why you get constipation if you hold it too long.

      • SnortsGarlicPowder@lemmy.zip
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        28 days ago

        I only know that from Bear Grylls and I think that guy is just a fetishist pretending to be a survivalist.

        • BowtiesAreCool@lemmy.world
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          27 days ago

          Ah, I learned it from Les Stroud aka Survivorman, who is the real deal, seems like Bear got it right for once.

          (Should be noted it’s not a good method and still has hazards, but could save your life if you don’t have another option- similar to how how Les will advocate for simply drinking from a mountain stream if you can’t purify- more than likely you won’t get giardia- even if you do, better than dying of dehydration after 3 days of no water)

      • Meron35@lemmy.world
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        27 days ago

        It should be the opposite. Saliva enzymes, stomach acid, and bile takes care of most pathogens, whereas anal lining is basically a direct route to your bloodstream.

        This is why anal is considered the riskiest option for sex or drugs.

      • Brave Little Hitachi Wand@lemmy.world
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        27 days ago

        We’re not even in the douche bag dystopia’s final form

      • Hanrahan@slrpnk.net
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        26 days ago

        Bear Gryls did this didn’t he ?

  • TrackinDaKraken@lemmy.world
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    28 days ago

    Anon WAS dehydrated.

  • AllNewTypeFace@leminal.space
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    28 days ago

    A normal day on 4Chan

  • ZoteTheMighty@lemmy.zip
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    28 days ago

    This is what Brent Kavanaugh meant in his high school yearbook when he said “Have you boofed yet?”

  • qyron@sopuli.xyz
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    28 days ago

    The dude was parched.

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