

the asahi mess is limited to M1/2 models
As of the Asahi Linux blog post from 2 days ago, they’re working on SPMI controller support, which is part of M3 support.
I wouldn’t really call Asahi a mess, they upstream their patches to the Linux kernel and are a part of the Fedora project. Also, Linus uses Asahi Linux for his travel laptop, a MacBook Air.
which are like 5 years old at this point.
M2 models were released in June 2022, they aren’t 3 years old yet.
Yes (see Question about Mac phoning home from 6 days ago, which is answered by the former Asahi Linux lead). There is no firmware-level Apple telemetry, and booting into Linux disables Find My.