Thanks for the suggestions. Had time to try to print it. Didn’t work. I’ll try the other options later.

If you look at the human empowerment model, it will all depend on whether the technological conditions, the educational resources, and the connective resources have gotten worse or not. If not, then people will mobilize and the massive protests will demand change, regardless of the government’s forceful opposition.

The critical question is whether the institutions of a nation are more or less democratic than its people. The World Value Survey clearly shows that some people like hierarchy, strict gender roles that confine people into little boxes, and clearly-defined “me-versus-them” boundaries. Those people will not protest against dictatorships. The rest will.

If you want more information on this, check out Freedom Rising by Christian Welzel.

That’s alright 🙂

No login at all. You just open the URL and there’s a text box waiting for you to send a message to me.

Oh wow. That’s a pleasantly surprising code of conduct. If the code of conduct is consequential, I stand corrected about my view of Graphene OS.

• “Respectful and kind”. Amazing.
• “Harassment is not tolerated”. Hell yeah.
• “Be respectful and constructive.” Brilliant.

You’re bringing up a fair point, similar to “can you separate the art from the artist”? I think it’s possible; I’ve seen mean and disparaging people do amazing work. Heck, at times I’ve been a cranky worker cranking out good work.

However, I also know that toxic people are hard to work with and limit their own potential and that of others. A quick look at the ACT literature, the intrinsic motivation literature, the learned-helplessness literature, and the Lybomirsky et al. meta-analyses from 2008 and 2018 all point to the same idea: psychologically flexible people are happier and that leads to better work and more productivity, but not the other way around.

https://www.reddit.com/r/degoogle/comments/v5n1yv/whats_your_opinion_on_graphene_os_community/

https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=30929526

A quick search lead to these links. They’re 3 years old. Maybe the community has changed since then.

This sounds amazing. It’s unfortunate that Graphene OS has so much toxicity around it, but this design decision is amazing. Love it.

I tried quickly looking for the feature, but I couldn’t find it. I searched for “Graphene OS Matrix chat homepage guest user”, “Graphene OS chat homepage guest user”, “Graphene OS chat homepage”, and “Graphene OS homepage QR” but didn’t find what you mentioned.

This ticks all the boxes! Thanks! I suppose something I didn’t contemplate is that I would like to close the chat and still be able to get notifications on my phone. I don’t want to always have a dozen chats open, ready for the other party to send me a message. Regardless, I’m glad this project exists!

Oh no. What have I done?

You care about love. You wrote this post. You mentioned someone who loved you as “wholesome”. You say you want to stop avoiding intimacy.

I’d dare to say you care about love, belonging, kindness, safety, and independence. I may be wrong with some or all of those, and I’m sorry if I misread you or made assumptions. However, feel free to write your own list of things that you care about. We humans care where we hurt and we hurt where we care. Think about your experience with love, intimacy, and relationships. Notice when something that hurts pops up. What would you not have to care about for this not to hurt?

It’s also important to notice that brain is trying to protect you. It’s trying to avoid the pain it has perceived in the past, the pain it (rightly or wrongly) predicts will appear in your future. It’s important to recognize its suggestions, its predictions, its interpretations. In case you don’t already do mindfulness practices in any way, you may consider taking it up. It’s important to be careful with what kind of mindfulness you do, because unfortunately there’s a lot of bad mindfulness out there, misinformation, incorrect takes, etc. Mindfulness as presented in programs like Healthy Minds are science-based and really helpful.

Once again, the reason I’m recommending mindfulness is because when you notice your brain’s advice, it’s easier to choose what kind of person you want to be. Once you know where you’re standing, it’s easier to take steps to where you want to go.

Just to comment on relationships. You mentioned that in a relationship it’s possible or likely that there’s “a whole-ass human depending on you or giving herself to you in every way”. Yes, some people think this is how relationships work, but it’s not the only way. You could read Sue Johnson’s Hold Me Tight to see how relationships can be different. The book might also be helpful to you because it explains how humans try to protect themselves even though they want to be close to each other.

Yes, love can be intoxicating “like a drug”. Seeing love through the lens of drugs suggests that we lose control with love. However, if you’re mindful about how it feels, you can both feel its beautiful sensations and also soberly choose what kind of person you want to be. Mindfulness, connection, and personal fulfillment can all coincide with a romantic relationship. Of course, it’s possible to be mindful, connected, and fulfilled without a romantic relationship, but it seems like you think the path towards a healthy romantic relationship is something you predict could make your life meaningful. You’re not alone; plenty of humans seek love in that way.

Others have suggested getting professional help. If so, you could consider looking for an Acceptance and Commitment Therapy therapist or a Coherence Therapy therapist.

To readers of this text who have seen my responses to other people, you may think that I see every situation as a nail that I hammer with my EFT, mindfulness, and ACT hammers. On the one hand, I ask whether you truly believe these situations would not benefit from those approaches. After all, they are evidence-based, trans-diagnostic, and have helped millions of people. On the other hand, it’s not necessary to follow the resources that I suggest; it’s possible to gain connection, awareness, and psychological flexibility in many ways. It’s a matter of finding what works for you.

I hope this helps.