A mere mortal such as yourself could never understand the power of a non-corporeal chicken

I wouldn’t celebrate too soon. The precogs they’ve got writing stuff over at the Onion are rarely wrong, they’re just early.

It’s not that this is a “bad thing”. It’s wildly ineffective, hypocritical, and a waste of resources when compared to other more pressing issues that they are doing nothing about. Thus, mockery.

The only fictional character I think could possibly move faster is MAYBE Superman in some of his more broken appearances.

You simply arent going to get past the insanity that is the “Speed Force” and I don’t think Sonic is going to trick West or Allen.

https://youtu.be/_hyPif9yhX0

Dudley Dursley is our president.