you dated an alien species that night

we have clearence, clarance

i used to nearly do that at planet fitness all the time it was embarassing how often i turn to go in then realise its the wrong room. never actually went in but still

the walking dead had that happen by spoiling a major character death about 2 hours BEFORE it premiered

i tried this once and oh man the womans restroom smelled so rancid i could never go back. it was traumatic

hey sometimes landlords have to get up and collect their checks and then go cash it. takes a lot out of you especially when they dont tip

sounds like the hook for a movie

honestly youd be pretty hard pressed to find a country now that wasnt previously stolen

hire a dude to lean on a post 12 hours a day occasionally saying “well met kinsman”

make real life whiterun from skyrim. i saw land for sale as a kid and that was my only plan if i had bought it

thats the hulk youre thinking of Bruce Springsteen

DUH!

with no shoes?

you can actually build a tolerance to it to where you dont feel any pain

mark hoppus of blink-182 would hit himself in the nuts over and over on the tour bus so he can hit himself in the nuts without pain