Tesla’s Cybertruck just made its grand debut at Mardi Gras 2025, and, well… it didn’t go great. Watch the Video: The Crowd Was Not Having It. A group of Cybertrucks rolled through the Orpheus Parade, a generally tame, family-friendly event known for marching bands, fabulous floats, and an all-around good time. But when the small […]
They can put this in their ads. “The new Tesla Cybertruck. Blood and garbage just wash off of it. It’s panels are rock resistant and even resist molotov cocktails for up to 3 minutes…”
How do you think the end would go?
All the screens went black a few moments ago, and smoke is starting to find it’s way in. Do you think a moment of painful irony will wash over them, that the same systems designed to keep others out will keep us in? Like the legendary city of Troy, we cannot get out once they are in?
Or do think, with their last gasp of breathable air, they curse the liberals and communists?
I would expect it would go something like “Dang woke DEI molotov cocktail, it’s trapped me in the master truck! Truly this is Obama’s fault.”
As a totally unrelated side note, I wonder how much thermite you’d need and where you’d need to place it to have it burn a hole through the car and into the battery, turning your cybertruck into a cyberfire.
Bahaha, they’ll need a long disclaimer. YMMV sort of language. The orange Cybertruck, they were live-streaming from inside of it, I guess. Influencers were driving it. They showed off the damage in their video, looks like a cracked windshield and roof on their “bulletproof” truck.